Your quarterly reminder — I’m still not Paul Westerberg

Dear Mike,

I am not Paul Westerberg. I am Jodi. I am sure Paul would love the fact that you like the way he sings eyes in Be My Darling. He’d also be thrilled that your cat says hi. However, I am not Paul Westerberg and therefore I cannot answer your questions regarding the release of 49:00, 5:05, or 3oclockreep on CD.

Keep on keeping on,
Jodi, queen of the underground, who is not Paul Westerberg

~~~~~~~~~
Dear Guitar Maker,

I am not Paul Westerberg. However, I am sure he’d love it if you sent me a handmade guitar.

Love you in the fall,
Jodi, queen of the underground, who is not Paul Westerberg

~~~~~~~~~
Dear Chris,

Thank you for not assuming I am Paul Westerberg. I truly appreciate it. However, I am not a man.

Sincerely,
Jodi, queen of the underground, who is not sporting a chain

~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Chris, Rob, Sid, Tommy, Bob, Kim, and Dopey,

Thank you for not assuming I am Paul Westerberg. I appreciate it. Also, I am sorry you missed the download of 49:00. That sucks. You should pay more attention. I am sure if you Googled hard enough you could find a download, somewhere.

Sincerely,
Jodi, queen of the underground, who is not Paul Westerberg

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Good God Almighty, let’s give praise to TuneCore Customer Service

As many of you who follow the comments know I had a few issues with getting 3oclockreep. It seems that when you use a PayPal e-check you have to wait roughly a fortnight for it to clear before you can download your music. Which sort of defeats the purpose of the instant gratification that digital download provides, right?

Sure, you say, just use the Google Checkout idiot. Riiggght. I tried that, about 93,183 times, and I kept getting a funky error.

Just buy it again, dumbass, you might say. I thought of that too, because, well it’s only $4. But then I remember that I don’t actually have a job and while it is only $4, I couldn’t make myself do it.

So I e-mailed TuneCore’s customer service begging them to cancel the stupid e-check order and allow me to buy it with my credit card. AND THEY DID!

Not only did they help me out, but after I had so many problems with Google Checkout they offered to help me out some more. Lucky for them (and double-plus lucky for me), I figured out how to get PayPal to use my damn debit card to let me get the songs RIGHT NOW. Because it’s been like 24 entire hours and I didn’t have them. I was going a little bit on the bonkers side of batshit insane. I am impatient if nothing else.

And in this digital age, I don’t think we often hear about the customer service wins. We always hear about the nightmares. But this, this was a win and I think TuneCore deserves some props for helping out a slightly-imbalanced Westernerd who needed a fix.

Now I am going to go listen to these songs on repeat and report back later, probably with lyrics.

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You know what we need?

We need more regular features here on Paul Westerberg.net. You know how we got Video Tuesday and In the Blogs, we need more things like that. Why don’t you suggest some, okay? Because my ideas so far haven’t been all that great:

1. Jay Taco’s weekly cracker review — this week the Wheat Thin, vile wafer of Satan or delicious, nutritious snack?
2. Update on our petition to get Our Man Paul on Live from Daryl’s House
3. Just more Hall & Oates content in general
4. Paul Westerberg: Vile wafer of Satan or delicious, nutritious snack
5. Sixteen different ways to spell nutricious and how none of them have anything to do with Paul Westerberg
6. Blasty’s weekly poetic waxing about Laurie Lindeen
7. This Week’s list of Paul Westerberg shout-outs by Craig Finn

See what I’m talking about?

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A lame housekeeping note

I upgraded the Forum today. I noticed there were a few problems logging in, I’m hoping it fixes the problem. If not, you should try logging in through the Wordpress login. If you have problems or questions, e-mail me at qotu@paulwesterberg.net.

Ugh. Okay it seems even after the upgrade the problem persists. I’m sorry. Apparently one must delete their browser cookies (it’s under your options > privacy) once you do that you should be able to login in again.

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You may have to wait

Rumor has it the 49 minutes for 49 cents hooha may be delayed until Monday. You know that somewhere an IT guy (or gal) is spazzing because someone decided it was a good idea to launch something on a Saturday.

We’ll get you the link as soon as we get it. Or as soon as we get home and find it in our inbox. Really, you should go see the Batman movie it rocks. Or, if you’re like me, you should go sit in the Minnesota soupy air and drink beer and eat potato salad.

What I can promise is that I will stop referring to myself as We and that I’ll get you that link as soon as I possibly can.

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On weddings, Westerberg weirdos, and forums

On Friday I attended my friend Scooter’s wedding. To some of you, the name might ring a bell. I first met Scooter on the Man Without Ties Message Board and then I met him in the flesh at Liquor Lyle’s before the first Paul Westerberg Pantages show back in, hrm, 2004?

I wasn’t the only Westernerd to represent at Scooter’s wedding, there was a fistful of weirdos there. Which is kind of what got me to thinking. All those weirdos at that wedding, I first met them on that MWT Board. I loved posting and playing on MWT, it was a lot of fun and I bet I still hold the posting record at something ridiculous like 5,000 posts.

Being at Scooter’s wedding made me all message board nostalgic. And for a bit I contemplated just starting to post at MWT again. But then I got that pit in my stomach and I knew that I couldn’t go back there because to do so would be supporting censorship and other behaviors I don’t agree with.

So, instead, I added a forum right here to this Web site. Hell yes, your eyes do not deceive. Do I expect to recapture the magic of the old MWT days? Nah. I expect to have a message board that’s better and more fun.

Like I said, I am completely opposed to censorship. I believe in the whole marketplace of free ideas. I will not delete posts that I don’t agree with (however, I will freely delete spam with an abandon you have not yet witnessed). We’re grownups here and we should conduct ourselves as such. If you’re acting like a jackass, I will have no problem calling you out on your jackassery. I hope that you feel comfortable enough to do the same to me, or to any of the other weirdos who decide to post in the forum.

The forum will only be as fun, useful, entertaining as you make it. If you’ve never posted in a forum before, give it a try — who knows maybe next summer you’ll get to go to someone’s kickass wedding and get drunk with a bunch of friends while listening to a rockabilly band.

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An Open letter to Sorry Ma

Dear Sorry Ma,

The Poll
has decided conclusively that you’re the Ralph Nader of the ‘Mats discography. Nice try taking me on. I’m gonna have to do something about that pesky Tim getting in my way. Sorry loser!

Love you in the fall,
I Will Dare and the rest of the Let it Be gang.

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Win a signed copy of All Over But the Shouting from Paul Westerberg.net

Don't be Careful with Your Love (small)
So last week I went to go see Jim Walsh read at the Barnes & Noble in the Galleria. I always say it’s the on at the Galleria, because I like to say Galleria and when I write I actually say all the stuff I’m writing in my head.

While I was there, I got my book signed, and then because I am a kind and gentle queen of the underground, I got another one signed for one lucky reader!

Woo to the hoo.

A Thing, I'll Give Away (small)
As you can see it’s an actual copy of All Over But the Shouting and not just a piece of paper that I had him sign in an attempt to fool all you.

The inscription is “Hey You, Remember singing iwilldare.com like we were headed for the promise land? Cheers, Jim Walsh.” It’s a riff on a Mad Ripple lyric from the song Homebodies (Don’t be careful with your love).

So what do you have to do to get this hot little number sent your way? Just leave a comment here telling us why you want the book or why you deserve the book or why you visit paulwestberg.net or why birds suddenly appear every time you are near.

Then we’ll put all the commenters names in a hat and draw one lucky winner.

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A note from the management

I know many of you are distraught about yesterday’s lack of the “In the Blogs” feature. I’m sorry. I was busy. I went to go see Jim Walsh read and then I had a short story due for class and then I got laid off from my job.

But I can promise you that tomorrow there will be a new and exciting giveaway here on Paul Westerberg.net. So stay tuned!

I forgot my one line so I just said what I felt

Okay. I’m working on this funky project thing that is going to remain shrouded in semi-secret for a bit here. However, in the creation of this semi-secret project I need some help from you, the smartest, most best Westernerds ever.

What I need is a great gob of Westerberg/’Mats one-liners. You know the lyrics that really kicked you in the teeth/ass/heart. Let me hear ‘em.

Trick is they need to be short, short, short 10-12 words max. The shorter the better.

Some of the ones I came up with on my own:
I will dare.
I hate music
Hot ‘un
(shut up, they do go beyond song titles, okay)
Playing makeup, wearing guitar
Wild & Lethal
My heart could use some glasses

Got it? Get to it. I need between 50-75 of these short little quips.

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